“When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.”
— KAHLIL GIBRAN
In my dreams you are not too far away. Maybe a short drive or a quick plane ride. You have achieved the hardest part of your journey and are now on a more measured ascent. Content, but still driven. Less impulsive, but nonetheless a force. We still talk every day. Sometimes we talk twice a day. Then my dreams get more abstract. It becomes too painful to fill in the details. Collateral losses, I think they call it. I call it the black hole of grief. Today I am back on the edge, dangling my feet. My visit here will be brief, for it has been almost 10 years since I first sat here, and I am stronger now, even as the pain never wanes. 33 years today and I can’t hold you in my arms, but I can celebrate you in my heart and in my mind and in my soul, exuberantly, with eternal love.
Profound, Lisa. Your words hit me to my core. Happy Birthday to your perfect and delightful Sophie, and to you Mama. Thinking of you both.
XOXO
❤